Ok, ok, I will admit I have been slacking on the blogging recently. I have come up with lots of really legitimate excuses for my online absence including nursing school (which I’m rocking, if I do say so myself), Mardi Gras, and the spring Festival Season in New Orleans (during which there is a festival/parade/extravaganza every weekend). Clearly, we’ve had a lot going on. But then in the midst of all of the crazy of regular life, I managed to add on the crazy of a break-up too. Ugh, bad timing!
Let’s be real, there is never a convenient time to break up a long term relationship. In hindsight, I probably should have waited until summer time when my schedule freed up a bit, but in the same way that you can’t really schedule a heart-attack or being struck by a meteorite, you kind of have to roll with a break-up when it happens.
So I’m rolling on quite successfully I think, all things considered. However, in my various stages of emotional rumination I have realized there is one key factor that helps someone successfully get through an emotional crisis- you have to have a buddy! For me, I’ve decided the best Break-Up Buddies are definitely dogs, in my case Pepper. Now, no offense to all of my girl friends that have all turned out to feed me copious amounts of booze, cook me meals, get me out of the house, and sprinkle me with post-break-up compliments- y’all are great too- but dogs are the ultimate Break-Up Buddies for the following reasons:
1. Cuddles! Generally, it’s rather frowned upon to get out of a relationship and jump into bed with another person, but dogs are fair game. With your dog you can go to bed with them every night, wake up up next to them every morning, and (in Pepper’s case) you might even get a good morning kiss from them. Plus, they are usually smaller than an actual person so you get way more bed space and they don’t tend to steal the covers as much either. So you get all of the cuddles without having to question your morals- it’s a win-win situation. Plus you get to wake up to this face:
2. They are ALWAYS happy to see you. Generally at the end of any relationship, you and the other person generally aren’t always particularly happy to see each other, and it isn’t always the warmest reception from them when you arrive home after a day of work. Dogs, however, always are happy to see you. Always. When I get home from class, Pepper is happy to see me. When I come back in from taking out the trash, Pepper is happy to see me. When I come out of the bathroom, Pepper is happy to see me. I literally just have to show up, and she acts like I’ve made her day! Talk about a great confidence boost.
3. They will go anywhere with you. This is similar to #2, but worth it’s own mention. Dogs just love to be with you and keep you company, something your ex probably didn’t towards the end of the relationship. Pepper is always willing to keep me company, no matter which errands I have to run. Our conversations usually go something like this:
Me: “Pepper, do you want to ride to the bank with me?”
Pepper: “Oh my God!! Yes, yes, yes!!! I love the bank!!!”
Me: “Pepper, do you want to stroll up to the corner store with me?”
Pepper: “Oh my God!! Yes, yes, yes!!! I love the corner store!!!”
Me: “Pepper, do you want walk around in circles with me because I’m losing my mind??”
Pepper: “Oh my God!! Yes, yes, yes!!! I love walking in circles!!!”
At least I know I’ll always have a companion anywhere I want to go, which is very reassuring.
4. They don’t judge you if you come home late. This is a biggy, because sometimes you just want to stay up late and drink with your girl friends and not get fussed at when you come home. For example, I may or may not have had a few nights when I came home at o’ dark thirty in the morning or a quarter-past sunrise, and Pepper was just as happy as ever to see me! (refer back to #2).
5. The don’t judge your break-up cuisine. Ice cream for dinner? No big deal! Nachos for breakfast? Who cares! You want to eat an entire bag of Cadbury Mini-Eggs? Go for it!! All she is concerned about is 1. Did I remember to feed her that day and 2. Can she lick the container. Done and done.
6. They keep you exercising. This is essential to ensure that the cuisine listed in #5 does not result in the dreaded break-up weight gain. With a dog, they need walks, and in our case Ginger Jogs, so it is an easy way to burn off whatever emotional binge occurred the night before. Again, this is a win-wn situation- I can eat what I want and don’t have to buy bigger pants.
7. They are good wingmen (or women). I know I’m biased, but luckily for me Pepper is a very good looking and unique dog. She has great markings, a cute face, and legs that most Victoria’s Secret models would envy so she tends to attract attention. She’s great when we are out on walks because she will grab the attention of various attractive male joggers (and yes, we’ve already mapped out peak jogging hours for our walking routes), and it never hurts to stop and chat for a minute or two. Even better is if she picks a guy with another dog to go play with. Then the conversation goes something like, “Oh, your dog likes to play ball? Mine too!” and it goes on from there.
So really, a break-up is going to suck whether you are 16 or 86, but they are manageable. I’m very thankful that I have my buddy with me along the way and I’m sure we’ll only have even more adventures are two single gingers out and about. Now if I could only find a way to get her to pay my bar tab, I’d be set.